Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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