Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Randomize
