I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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