More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
