First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Randomize
