yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
