Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Randomize
