nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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