i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
