he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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