no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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