There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
You left your phone here
Wait...
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