xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Randomize