So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Randomize
