We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
