I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Randomize