Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Randomize
