You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
