The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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