Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Randomize