dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
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