Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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