apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
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I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
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All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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