why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
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