I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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