Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
