So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
You're like the curious george of whores
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Randomize
