Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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