If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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