You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Randomize
