I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Randomize
