i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
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