I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
operation harelip BJ is a go
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
