i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
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ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
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I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
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