no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
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dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
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