So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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