I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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