I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
