He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
