is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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