Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
just found out that she named her cat after me.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
