eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Randomize