I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize