just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
