dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Randomize