When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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