I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
