We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
