You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Randomize
