You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
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