oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
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She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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