oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
