Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Boobs speak an international language.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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