i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
